tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post5480840651091092408..comments2024-02-16T00:48:56.686-08:00Comments on The Man Who Painted Agnieszka's Shoes: You Make You Own Luck. If You Want it Badly Enough You'll Succeed...Agnieszkas Shoeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07831763071877082489noreply@blogger.comBlogger32125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-50889346885376740302010-01-25T07:57:08.984-08:002010-01-25T07:57:08.984-08:00"Most of us need a very solid business plan, ..."Most of us need a very solid business plan, a very acute sense of self-awareness, and a healthy dose of realism."<br /><br />I am making another anachronistic and months- later remark to this thought (in case anyone is still looking here).<br /><br />As a generalization this is generally very wise, Dan. I'm not sure extreme artists ever fall into the 'wise' category. However, pragmatic and successful while highly talented persons have this stamp. Genii Bach, Chaucer, the Rennaissance painters, and Shakespeare all had it. Arguably, it is the age we live in that determines just what is too risky to our being and what is essential TO our being here at all. Arguably, mania and dedicatory destitution are Sometimes necessary components in artistic profiles. Eastern Europeans tend to favor this thought and remnants of the Romantic age. Van Gogh and quite a few notable poets seem to adhere to it. However, some people decide 'life' over art is the thing. Survival is life. They find a path that reconciles the passionate drive with the need to remain in body to be passionate. That probably says/adds nothing to this discussion, but I thought I'd jump in half a year later anyway. And say it.M M Fahrenhttp://mmfahren.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-86958852012565064512009-09-03T02:34:18.972-07:002009-09-03T02:34:18.972-07:00Hi Micahel thank you for coming over. It's int...Hi Micahel thank you for coming over. It's interesting that the very most "successful" people we see in the business world have often gone bankrupt or come close in teh past. I think there is a certain amount of risk-taking required to be at the very pinnacle. The problem is that most of us see those people and model ourselves on them - but most of us don't want to be at the summit. We DO want to do the very best we can, but in terms of financial reward, most of us just want to get by - and I think that requires a very different mindset - and one that doesn't make for such glamorous self-help books. I LOVED "The Black Swan" - but I think as a guide for the person in the street it does way more harm than good. Most of us need a very solid business plan, a very acute sense of self-awareness, and a healthy dose of realism. Not very glamorous, but more useful than the "reach for the stars" stuff we often get sold.Agnieszkas Shoeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07831763071877082489noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-11300318177198114472009-09-01T14:01:08.066-07:002009-09-01T14:01:08.066-07:00I'm coming in a bit late to this, I know. Draw...I'm coming in a bit late to this, I know. Draw the line, you said, Dan. Good advice, though knowing when and where to draw it is tricky. I nearly went bankrupt in a business I had started a few years ago, because I was so convinced (into Positive Mental Attitude big-time) that if I believed a bit more, worked a little bit harder and / or a little bit smarter, etc. ("KBO", as Churchill used to say) then things would work out. Things didn't and eventually I had to draw that line but I should have done it sooner. Despite the financial consequences of that experience, I am not yet as cynical as W C Fields: "If at first you don't succeed ... give up. Don't be a fool."<br /><br />BTW, I especially liked the fact that you advised people to decide for themselves what they meant by "make it": we are many of us too influenced by society's definitions of success. And your implication that if you give up the "day job" it will, or at least might, take you longer to get there, not shorter.Michael MacMahonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07325608597446239064noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-14798906332082789792009-08-25T03:54:21.275-07:002009-08-25T03:54:21.275-07:00A sport where the athletes still chew (and spit) t...A sport where the athletes still chew (and spit) tobacco... History is indeed written by the winners. In this case a load of drug cheats who hold all the batting recordsSulci Collectivehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03293833259808943096noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-87612032459557398762009-08-24T23:49:13.195-07:002009-08-24T23:49:13.195-07:00I came across a blog yesterday with that title (hi...I came across a blog yesterday with that title (history is written by the winners) and was expecting an uplifting cultural challenge. It turned out to be about baseball!Agnieszkas Shoeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07831763071877082489noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-7816771845817709462009-08-24T13:26:49.353-07:002009-08-24T13:26:49.353-07:00Ha, history is for and written by the victors. (Ma...Ha, history is for and written by the victors. (Maybe those exhorting us to 'try harder'?) I today's terms that either means commercial success, or being an internet "Lege". <br /><br />As to unleashing frequencies, as the earth's magnetic poles are currently in the long, drawn our process of switching polarity, I don't want to do anything that risks perpetrating knocking it off its axis any further. These are trying times.,,Sulci Collectivehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03293833259808943096noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-68789843290784518362009-08-24T11:06:42.707-07:002009-08-24T11:06:42.707-07:00Sulci, I have known a couple of people who've ...Sulci, I have known a couple of people who've had a snif at a deal. A smaller couple who actually have a deal. They do more for their literary fellows than anyone I know.<br /><br />You in particular persist because history would be poorer if you did not.<br /><br />You really should unleash your writing upon the world more often.Agnieszkas Shoeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07831763071877082489noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-40731180369539002212009-08-24T04:17:18.205-07:002009-08-24T04:17:18.205-07:00You mean there are people out there who will pass ...You mean there are people out there who will pass comment on our efforts? I will have to emerge from underneath my stone then...<br /><br />Solipsism, you can't beat it. My vision is right and true and it's the failure of all mortal folk out there who can't see it for all its dazzling fulguration. Is this any less destructive than the 'Must try harder' brigade? <br /><br />Writing communities will only get us so far. Our chosen art form is still a subjective and isolating one. Someone gets the sniff of a book deal, they'll be off like a shot. There is no way they can pull us their mates up the ladder with them. <br /><br />Sorry to be a touch negative, but it's been 25 years and counting for me. I persist, because my CNS demands that I do.Sulci Collectivehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03293833259808943096noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-85405045925987702402009-08-24T02:13:01.352-07:002009-08-24T02:13:01.352-07:00Thanks, CDU. I haven't, but I will certainly t...Thanks, CDU. I haven't, but I will certainly take a look. It does seem that the people who benefit most from the self-help industry are the practitioners.Agnieszkas Shoeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07831763071877082489noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-55035003046877177152009-08-23T14:43:30.903-07:002009-08-23T14:43:30.903-07:00Coming in here very late Dan. I read this earlier ...Coming in here very late Dan. I read this earlier and went away to hunt in my memory for a book I read some time ago. Have you come across Steve Salerno's "SHAM, How the gurus of the self help movement make us helpless"?catdownunderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06959328192182156574noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-84205514644203609362009-08-22T19:13:25.069-07:002009-08-22T19:13:25.069-07:00let me just quickly say...(from the southern hemis...let me just quickly say...(from the southern hemisphere, so you are all asleep and i always have to come in late) I tell my kids 'if you study hard you will get a good job.) I know it's UTTTER bullshit. I studied hard and have three degrees mouldering in my study to show for it. But I can't say to them 'make the best of what comes your way, be flexible in your goals, recognise good fortune when it happens to you, consider the journey not the destination and remember your dreams and desires are quite often manufactured by a system that wants you to spend money rather than live as whole a life as possible.'<br />I can't say it because a. I want them to study hard and b. they don't f**king listen to me anywayPhillipanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-9501145852142725532009-08-22T10:09:45.254-07:002009-08-22T10:09:45.254-07:00Gosh, it's getting hot in here :-) I had no id...Gosh, it's getting hot in here :-) I had no idea when I posted this just what a reaction I was going to get. <br /><br />I wonder if maybe it's time for me to post something else now.<br /><br />Rebecca, it's a wonderful thing to have the mental fortitude to be able to do that, but my personal experience is there are times when that simply isn't possible, and holding onto dreams that one can't fulfil (I would say if I still believed I could beat Usain, but even I might give up on that, so let's say if I realy believed, 8 years ago, that I could be a world powerlifting champion [dicky knee and elbow aside, my arms and legs are just too long - they're the wrong shape for evertything, in fact]) can actually be damaging, because you add guilt and inadequacy to the existent disappointment. Sometimes you have to try and come up with other dreams, but when depression gets too much you have sometimes to put dreams on hold and just focus on surviving.<br /><br />Jane, I agree with everything you say.<br /><br />I've just re-read Rebecca's comment and I can see that actually the point you're making is not there's no such thing as depression but that depression sucks - on which I'm wholly in accord with you. I do try to nip it in the bud whenever I can feel it coming, boy I try (and it DOES help knowing what the onset signs are). But sometimes I just have to admit it's stronger than me. I find it's rather like facing a tidal wave. If one stands on the beach and tries to hold one's ground, it will just knock you down. If you jump in and let it take you, eventually it'll run its course and you'll come out the other side.<br /><br />And now for something completely different - a brief guide to the BookbuzzrAgnieszkas Shoeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07831763071877082489noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-54518973101611187972009-08-22T07:40:06.033-07:002009-08-22T07:40:06.033-07:00Rebecca, I appreciate your sentiment but I have to...Rebecca, I appreciate your sentiment but I have to take exception to this comment of yours: "Dreams aren't BS: depression is BS." <br /><br />Real depression is a severe illness, just like cancer or pneumonia. Just like those other diseases, depression can last for years, can stop you functioning, and can easily kill you. <br /><br />I've suffered from depression on and off since I was eleven years old. I'm grateful to have been free of a full-blown episode for nearly a decade now but it's still there, simmering away beneath the surface and yes, there are sometimes things that I can do to chase it away; but when it really gets a grip on me I can't just refuse to play along with it and instantly be better. It's far too strong a force for that to be possible.<br /><br />Depressives don't choose to have depression any more than cancer sufferers choose to have cancer, and suggesting that people have any choice about whether or not they're going to "give in" to their depression not only reveals a lack of understanding of the condition, it's horribly unkind to the people who it affects (not that I think you mean to be, but there you go). <br /><br />Sorry to go off-topic for my rant. I return you all to normal service now.Jane Smithhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03411253302725735470noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-47658435232434191532009-08-22T06:21:16.947-07:002009-08-22T06:21:16.947-07:00Dreams aren't BS: depression is BS.
Nobody ...Dreams aren't BS: depression is BS. <br /><br />Nobody should surrender their dreams because of a fear of depression. Life is too short. <br /><br />In my mental garden, I prune out depression the second it shows but my dreams are wild flowers that seed constantly and are abuzz with butterflies and bees. When they die, more replace them the next year and I let them grow over everything. If you want 'scientific' examples of the numerous times I've achieved impossible things, I'll provide them but for now, I like this image so I'll leave it at that. :)<br /><br />RebeccaRebecca Woodheadhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07106239932549493237noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-31663684999265476202009-08-22T03:56:35.706-07:002009-08-22T03:56:35.706-07:00Phillipa, how strongly your comments about "s...Phillipa, how strongly your comments about "soulmate" (for want of another word), children, health and fluid opportunities resonate with me. My expectations for life 20 years ago were that I would find a man I could just about cope with living with, have lots of children who I would adore, and be generally healthy. Instead, I have had the exceptionally good luck to marry a man I absolutely adore, the rather bad luck of discovering I am unable to have any children at all, and whatever kind of luck that means I have a long-term mental health disability to deal with. No amount of "hard work" or visualisation can produce the children, but the amazing husband I now have is not one I could have visualised in a million years!<br /><br />Oh, yes, I am the wife who does the cross-stitch (which is why Agnieszkas Shoes picked that example), makes models and reads Richard Wiseman!ViolaMathshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05245505796473322898noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-4061240393659374342009-08-22T03:38:10.545-07:002009-08-22T03:38:10.545-07:00Hi Mr Kimi - yes, my wife has alerted me to the re...Hi Mr Kimi - yes, my wife has alerted me to the research Richard Wiseman (twitter's favourite scientist and all-round interesting guy) has been doing on this - in academia, it seems, there are instances where positive visualisation leads to lesser performance, because people don't work as hard. <br /><br />Phillipa, as ever, I don't have a lot to say, other than that you have a wonderful way of putting things, and it's been really nice to hear from people with experience of many fields of the arts. Interesting to hear it took you three years (and fascinating that, like me, you set yourself 5 years as the target. Maybe I'm not too far off the mark :-))Agnieszkas Shoeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07831763071877082489noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-91089376229313580572009-08-21T23:53:23.340-07:002009-08-21T23:53:23.340-07:00I heard of some serious research into the 'Jus...I heard of some serious research into the 'Just Try Harder' style of motivation and its effects recently. It turns out that people with high self esteem make better use of it than the rest of us, who just get depressed and don't get anywhere.<br /><br />There's a strange mix of luck and hard work and maybe other stuff involved in setting our limits. Much stranger than simplistic stuff these guys trot out.Roger Parkinsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11836716475958789046noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-22048816980069184182009-08-21T20:07:14.507-07:002009-08-21T20:07:14.507-07:00I'm coming in on the tail end here. It's a...I'm coming in on the tail end here. It's a great post and an important issue for those of us who toil in the arts/writing industries. Luck has so much to do with success, more than we want to recognise. Random accidents of fate propel some up some down. If you are lucky enough to have something in hand when the opportunity comes along then well and good. If not, well that's how life is.<br />Not everyone meets their soulmate (vile term), has children, stays healthy and so on. What we expect and what happens are often wildly disparate. I think a solution is to keep very fluid and accept that while commercial publishing may pass you by, all your efforts have brought you other things, other opportunites, other journeys to take, other people to befriend and other shades of your own self to know. Quite often the whole process is like posting a letter - it may arrive at it's destination ten years later and contribute to what you are doing at that time. <br />With a painting you have to know when to stop, and with a book too, it's good to develop that insight, even if the painting or mss is flawed - you have to let it go and keep moving. I gave myself five years to get a commercial contract and I was offered one after three. I'm a mutant. But all it really means is the goal posts shifted a bit - if still got to practice and work and face the possibility of tanking. If it still feeds me what I need, but I'm sitting in the garbage bin at the back of the publishers office, I'll keep going. Not to be a success but because it's what I do - whether others like it or not.<br />What a ramble!Phillipahttp://www.phillipafioretti.com.aunoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-76976819079398243102009-08-21T03:04:27.226-07:002009-08-21T03:04:27.226-07:00Bless you, Jane - it's sort of the practical c...Bless you, Jane - it's sort of the practical conclusion of the piece I sent you for your Bad Science series.<br /><br />My wife is a cross-stitch wizz. Model-making too. I have absolutely no idea how she can work with that degree of "tweezer skill" as I believe it's called!!Agnieszkas Shoeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07831763071877082489noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-32924755748317473592009-08-21T02:18:18.008-07:002009-08-21T02:18:18.008-07:00A lovely piece, Dan. I might just have to steal i...A lovely piece, Dan. I might just have to steal it for my own blog...!<br /><br />It's important, too, to remember that while one writing direction might not lead to success (whatever success is), another might do better: so, while a writer might find it impossible to get her novels published she might well have great success if she starts writing non-fiction or journalism. Sometimes you don't have to give up your dreams, just re-frame them a little.<br /><br />(As for cross-stitch: I can't stand it: it's far too little and careful for me. But I sew needlepoint almost compulsively and we have a few sofas we can no longer sit down on because of all the cushions I've made. Lovely stuff.)Jane Smithhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03411253302725735470noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-53919560398543180032009-08-21T00:30:47.419-07:002009-08-21T00:30:47.419-07:00@tony hmm, yes, being 37, a bit overweight, and wi...@tony hmm, yes, being 37, a bit overweight, and with an ever so slightly dicky knee (not helped by the aforementioned powerlifting) might not help.<br /><br />@mm comment as often and at as much length as you like. That's a very important point about the subtle and insidious ways we shift the goalposts in our mind, and one day we can wake up and find the thing that was once a source of joy is now just a chore - and we never even noticed it happen.Agnieszkas Shoeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07831763071877082489noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-4710774303159535362009-08-20T19:30:28.288-07:002009-08-20T19:30:28.288-07:00One mo' thing: Maria Montessori for a little w...One mo' thing: Maria Montessori for a little while (and Alternative Education for a few decades) took the sting and the praise out of 'evaluation' in Education. Real Ed. in this ideology is intrinsic, self-motivated. The 'work' is framed to be self-corrective, so the pleasure comes in simply 'doing the work'. Both praise and 'error' calling are erased in preference to observation. i.e. "Ah, I notice that you are placing the red block in the blue circle area." (Obviously calling attention to Difference in choice, not necessarily 'error'.) Or, "I see the small pink cube is holding up the larger one." (And then it is tone of inflection which makes it a kind of game.) So how do I apply that to the comma splice or to character development, even? "Mmmmmh. The mailman passing by is very visual with description, while the main POV character, a neglected housewife, seems to be painted almost transparent. Is that important?" <br /> Or how apply it to evaluative feedback I receive?<br />"Let's see, 25% or so find it irritating or missing something. Another 25% are hoping I'll leave it exactly as it is. 15% think I should move on to something else. About 35% (I'm being facetious--I can't do percentages!) think it's exceedingly remarkable and want me to 'just finish it'!" How will I allow this to inform my edits? Am I writing for all of these people or for only 35%?(Assuming this is candour and also that they will hold to these opinions.) Do I chance losing the life of it for the 15%?<br />It IS a game. The A is a symbol of what? The D of what? What if I WANT to please only the positive people? Or am I desperate to only please the negative for that matter? HECK! What if I write what I absolutely hate just so somebody says, "You rock!" Sometimes the pink tower rests on a smaller cube.<br /> I hope I will not say anything else for a long time. And, uh, Ag's Shoes--thanks for the praise. . .hah. See what happens?m.m.Fahren (talewagger)noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-28218453527866214632009-08-20T16:16:08.693-07:002009-08-20T16:16:08.693-07:00Dan, I hate to say it, but I think that having sho...Dan, I hate to say it, but I think that having short legs may not be the only reason for your inability to beat Usain Bolt ;)Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07546287562521628467noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-55867036798682063352009-08-20T13:40:24.988-07:002009-08-20T13:40:24.988-07:00Looks like he still is. Wow - I remember him being...Looks like he still is. Wow - I remember him being associated with Mencap when I were a lad. <br /><br />Not a lot more I can say because I agree completely. And it IS cruel, because as soon as they leave school they wonder what's happening and why things aren't as they were told they'd be.<br /><br />I taught A-levels for several years & was encouraged to mark "encouragingly" (not to the exam board's mark scheme. When students who'd been given As all year suddenly got a D in their exam they would be in tears - they thought they were doing what was needed. It's just wrong. One of those cases where being "nice" in the short run is so damaging in the long run.Agnieszkas Shoeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07831763071877082489noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8020036606005757534.post-75935846400277977512009-08-20T13:14:43.761-07:002009-08-20T13:14:43.761-07:00sadly the way teachers are encouraged to behave to...sadly the way teachers are encouraged to behave towards pupils will perpetuate the myth. Everyone has to succeed, there are no failures. I was taught to mark great big ticks on correct answers, ignore wrong ones. Everyone has to be praised, all the time - so kids assume they really can do anything and everything. I've been looking for something I read by Brian Rix, but can't find it. He was (maybe is?) chaiirman of Mencap, and had a daughter with Downs Syndrome. The quote I was looking for was about the futility [for his daughter] of believing you can achieve whatever you want if you try hard enough - for some, it just isn't going to happen.Heather Leavershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11330793797439133950noreply@blogger.com